The Idaho Connection

As my lovely better half pointed out, this whole topless picture scandal was a smear job. Well, we know now who was behind it. Apparently there is an ultra secret ultra right wing group of Mormon Polygamists called the "One in Tens". They believe in plural marriage but there is a catch. One in ten of your wives has got to be another man. Apparently, Senator Larry Craig, who belongs to this group, got it in his head to make Mitt Romney his male wife. He must have thought that he could take his relationship as Mitt's Idaho Campaign Chairman to the next level and become Mitt's husband.

He got Mitt drunk and had this shocking photo taken in order to blackmail Mitt into agreeing to the marriage. It turns out that Larry Craig was telling the truth when he said he wasn't gay.The incident at the Minneapolis Airport was simply this manlove newbie's way of learning what to do on his wedding night with Mitt.

The Church Elders of the "One in Tens" really loved the photo and realized that with a little Photoshop, it could be doctored up to smear my wife Missy Scupperton and thus sink my Presidential candidacy. Well, I have got overwhelming public support on this. Thanks for standing behind us, America!

By the way, I honor Mitt and Larry's committment to each other. Their love is NOT the issue! But illegal use of Photoshop to smear a political opponent is simply beyond the bounds of decency. Case Closed!!!!

Next Item Previous Item