Rusty, Scientist as well as Statesman

Like Thomas Jefferson and other political figures before me, I am fascinated by science. Much of my spare time is devoted to the hard work of genetic husbandry. As a child, I was obsessed with the HG Welles novel, "The Island of Doctor Moreau", and I have labored mightily to bring the good Doctor's work to reality.

Most of you know all about JohnnyBoy, my hybrid terrier who is a math genius. But JohnnyBoy is NOT my only success story. I have also succeeded in creating Ferdinand, a human-bull hybrid and Zarah, a human-salmon hybrid. Tragically, while vacationing with me and the other Scuppertons in Ocean City recently, Zarah was taken and devoured by an osprey. We were bodysurfing in the waves when this osprey came out of nowhere and seized Zarah.

I am often asked if there are ever any problems with these creatures. There has been one minor problem, and that is that both JohnnyBoy and Ferdinand have an eye for the ladies, and I do mean human ladies. This can be a bit disconcerting for women sunbathing on the beach, especially when my two red-blooded pets make various "woofing" sounds. On the other hand, some of the ladies seem pretty flattered by the attention! Anyway, I talk to JohnnyBoy and Ferdinand all the time and I am pretty sure they know the boundaries of acceptable behavior.

This classic tale of the wonders of science inspired a young Rusty Scupperton to begin his works in genetic engineering.

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